Well Shut My Mouth

Last week I posted my set of rules to live by as a pastor.  If you remember, I have two rules about communication.  Rule #26 and Rule #27 both help to remind me about the importance of communicating with others.  I broke Rule #27 the other day.

The problem all started when Haskell UMC booked two Friday night events back-to-back.  This Friday is homecoming and our church is sponsoring the 5th Quarter after the ballgame.  Since it is the first event, the 5th Quarter has been on my mind the last few weeks.  The other big event that our church is sponsoring is the pre-game meal on October 7th.  This is a great fundraiser for our church and it takes a lot of preparation and a lot of help from several different people.  The other day after church one of my wonderful parishioners came up to me and said that she and her good friend have helped with the meal and they have a file folder with all of the information in it.  She said "pre-game meal" but I heard "5th Quarter."  So here is the conversation that took place between us.

Parishioner: "Pastor, I have all of the information we need to get everything done for our meal."
Me:  "Well, I talked with some of the parents and they don't want to serve a meal this year."
Parishioner: "Why not?"
Me:  "They said there was a lot of left overs last year and that we should just serve chips and dip and cookies this year."
Parishioner: "We didn't have a lot of left overs last year.  In fact, we ran out of food and we need to make extra this year.  Besides I'm not sure people will pay $7.00 a ticket for chips and dip."
Me: We charge people to come?"
Parishioner: "We have to charge people, this is a fundraiser for our church."
Me: "I thought it was just a ministry that we did for the community."
(Awkward Silence)
Parishioner: "What are you talking about?"
Me: "The 5th Quarter.  What are you talking about?"
Parishioner: "The pre-game meal."

Happily, it ended up being no big deal and we had a good laugh about it.  But, this conversation reinforced the need to communicate with people.  Just because we were talking does not mean that we were communicating.  Many times, that is what ends up happening.  We do more talking than we do listening and then nothing gets done because no one knows what is going on.

Even though this time it turned out well, it does not mean that it always does.  Sometimes we get so busy talking and don't listen that the situation escalates until people get mad at one another and feelings get hurt.  Many times, relationships are hurt and friendships ruined because of poor communication.  What's worse is when someone intentionally causes a rift.  Scripture is full of warnings and truths that come about due to us talking too much and not listening enough.  Here are a few to consider:

"The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly."-Proverbs 15:2
"The mind of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil."-Proverbs 15:28
"The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, but the mouth of the wicked what is perverse."-Proverbs 10:32
"The mouths of fools are their ruin, and their lips a snare to themselves."-Proverbs 18:7

Our words are very important.  They can build others up and they can tear others down.  Our words can proclaim the gospel message of Jesus Christ or they can advance the enemy of God's Holy Kingdom.  James warns us that we should tame our tongue; he also admits that it is very difficult to do.  "With it (our tongue) we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse those who are made in the likeness of God.  From the same mouth come blessing and cursing.  My brothers and sisters, this ought not to be so."--James 3:9-10.  But just because something is difficult that does not mean that we must stop trying.  We have to continue to depend on the Holy Spirit to purify us in all areas.  We must continue to push forward in our faith journey and allow ourselves to be transformed more fully into the likeness of Jesus Christ.

Communicating and speaking wholesome words are so important in our everyday life.  As Christians, our words and our discussions should be focused on listening more than we speak, weighing our words carefully before we speak, and then only speaking after we know what we are talking about.  I know I've been guilty of poor communication and talking too rashly.  However, by the grace of God I am getting better.  Until next time...

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Wilhite's Rules

Fall has officially arrived; the new television season has begun.  A couple of years ago, I started watching some of the crime shows on TV.  NCIS, CSI, The Mentalist, and Criminal Minds.  All of these shows have the same basic plot format.  A crime occurs (usually a murder), a group of people come together as a team to gather evidence, work on DNA found, and catch the bad guy.  I'm not sure what it is about these shows that is appealing, but I can't help myself.  I really enjoy seeing the teamwork, the camaraderie, and how the people go about solving the case.  I have told Myranda that one of these days an acronym (FBI, NCIS, CSI, or CBI) is going to call me in to help them.  After all, I am already an acronym (PEUMC)!  But she's not convinced.


One of the characters in the show NCIS is named Jethro Gibbs.  Throughout the series various characters reference a set of "rules" that Gibbs has.  So far, not all of Gibbs Rules have been revealed but the show's producers have promised that more will come to light in the upcoming season.  These rules have inspired me to think about my own set of rules that I should follow as a pastor and as a Christian.  So I have created a set that seem like they work for me.  Over time, the rules can be amended and more rules can be added.  At times, the rules have to be bent when a situation arises.  But overall, the rules really help to keep my life and vocation focused.  


When making my rules, I kept in mind Matthew 10:16 when Jesus says, "See, I am sending you out like sheep into the midst of wolves; so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves."  I think you will see both sides of the coin reflected in these rules.  Many people think that Christianity is a faith where we have to lay our courage and boldness down and allow other people to walk all over us.  That is simply not so.  In our faith, we are called to speak boldly and truthfully.  We are also called to radical love and hospitality.  In our worldly culture these are backwards.  According to the world you speak kindly and smoothly while acting selfishly.  


The other thing that I kept in mind while creating my set of rules was my deep desire to know God.  In my own experience, the closer I get to God, the more I desire him.  I can't explain why or how, but as my spiritual life continues to develop, the more of God's Spirit I crave.  The more I want to reflect God to a broken world and the more I want to genuinely show people who he is and how they can grow in their relationship too.  


I invite you to read through Wilhite's Rules.  You will notice that I borrowed a few of the rules from others.  Where I did, I have noted it.  I encourage you to draw up a list of rules for yourself.  See what you come up with.  Feel free to comment here about my rules or tell me some of yours.  Until next time... 


Wilhite's Rules

Rule #1: Always start the day with prayer.

Rule #2: Read a chapter from the Old Testament and a chapter from the New Testament every day.

Rule #3: Always Trust God.

Rule #4: Let others use their gifts.

Rule #5: Be a good steward.

Rule #6: Apologize if you hurt someone, but never apologize for your beliefs.

Rule #7: Let your sermon marinate.

Rule #8: Be thankful.

*Rule #9: Always carry a knife.

Rule #10: Respect the elders.

Rule #11: Never let office work take the place of ministry.

Rule #12: Visit the nursing home and shut-ins.

Rule #13: Help those in need, but don’t let them take advantage of you.

Rule #14: Always be ready to give your testimony.

*Rule #15: Always work as a team.

Rule #16: Never “think” of someone, pray for them.

Rule #17: Always forgive.

Rule #18: Always turn your forms in on time.

Rule #19: Always be reading something.

Rule #20: Sing at church.

Rule #21: Shop locally.

Rule #22: Don’t be a slave to your phone.

*Rule #23: Never mess with a Pastor’s coffee, if you want to live.

Rule#24: Eat peppermint during sermon preparation.

Rule #25: Always think sermonically.

Rule #26: Always communicate.

Rule #27: When you communicate, listen more than you speak.

Rule #28: Always be honest with yourself. (To thine own self be true.)

Rule #29: There are always three sides to every story; side 1, side 2, and the truth.

Rule #30: Never confuse membership with discipleship.

Rule #31: Always take time off.

Rule #32: Always tell your spouse and kids you love them.

Rule #33: Never confuse dogmata with doctrines.

Rule #34: Always depend on the Holy Spirit, for everything.

Rule # 35: Never get involved in politics, but always pray for your leaders.

*Rule #36: If you feel like you are being played, you are.

Rule #37: Never sit in the back row of the sanctuary.

Rule #38: Always appreciate tradition, but don’t worship it.

*Rule #39: There is no such thing as coincidence.

*Rule #40: If it seems like someone is out to get you, they are.

Rule #41: If someone gives you something, send a thank you note.

Rule #42: Never disrespect the Sacraments.

Rule #43: Practice the means of grace.

Rule #44: Always use proper grammar.

*Rule #45: Clean up the mess that you make.

Rule #46: Go wherever God sends you.

Rule #47: Never confuse a job with a vocation.

**Rule #48: Do no harm.

**Rule #49: Do good.

**Rule #50: Stay in love with God.

*Rule #51: Sometimes you’re wrong.

Rule #52: Never stop learning.

*These rules come from Gibb’s Rules on NCIS.

**These come from Rueben P. Job’s Three Simple Rules: A Wesleyan Way of Living

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"He shall be to you a restorer of life and a nourisher of your old age..."

Tucked away in the midst of the history of Israel is a short story that highlights the struggles of a woman and her daughter-in-law.  This story falls between the time of the judges of the tribes and the formation of the monarchy. It is a wonderful story that has much to teach us in our 21st century world.  This is the story of Naomi and Ruth.

Ruth and Naomi 

I'm sure you all remember the story.  Both of Naomi's sons and her husband died while they were living in Moab.  With no one to turn to, Naomi decides to go back to her own people in Judah.  She tells her daughters-in-law to go back home to their own families.  Orpah does go back, but Ruth refuses.  She takes up residence with Naomi and becomes a part of Naomi's family.

The rest of the story is about how Ruth provides food for Naomi and herself by gleaning from the fields of their neighbors.  She meets a kinsman, Boaz, and eventually marries him, gives birth to a son, and brings joy back into Naomi's life.  It's all a good story, but there is more to it than that.  When you read closely you see an abundance of goodness taking place by those who are involved.

Ruth gleaning the fields.

First, there is an abundance of goodness that shines through Ruth.  As a foreigner to the Jewish faith, Naomi did not expect Ruth to continue to live with her.  Ruth was free to leave Naomi on her own and yet she chooses to make her life with her mother-in-law.  Not only does she make her life with Naomi, but she sees after her.  She volunteers to go out into the fields and labor in the hot sun so that they can eat.  She accepts the faith of Naomi as her own faith and begins to worship the God of the Israelites.

We also see the great abundance that comes through Boaz.  He notices Ruth and he offers her the opportunity to glean from his fields.  Not only that, but he instructs his men to leave extra grain behind so that she has plenty of grain to harvest.  Boaz insures that Ruth and Naomi have everything they need and more.

When it comes time to "redeem" the land of Naomi, Boaz approaches the one with the first right of redemption.  He follows the law and yet he makes sure that Ruth and Naomi are cared for.  When the first man in line refuses, Boaz gladly takes his place, knowing that the first child that Ruth has will be in the line of the first husband.

Ruth, Naomi, and Obed

All through the story we are reminded of grace in abundance.  We are reminded of mercy beyond measure.  If we look closely, we see that Boaz and Ruth both act in accordance with the heart of the law, not the letter of the law.  They both extend the same kind of grace, mercy, and justice that God extends to those who will accept the gift.  When you read through to the end of the story, it becomes clear why the book of Ruth is placed where it is in Scripture.  In the final verses of the book, we find a genealogy.  Verse 17 states this, "The women of the neighborhood gave him a name, saying, 'A son has been born to Naomi.'  They named him Obed; he became the father of Jesse, the father of David."  The future king of Israel descended through the line of a lowly Moabite.  The king that unites the people of God and through whom the Messiah would come was born into a family that were everyday people.  They had hardship; they had sad times.  They also went beyond what the rule book said and found the face of God.  They worked out of love, kindness, and devotion instead of worrying about whether they gave enough.

If you have not read this book in awhile, I encourage you to do so.  Look at the ways that the different people      go beyond the requirements and do the things that need to be done.  We can all learn a lot from Ruth and Boaz.  We can all go beyond the normal and extend grace upon grace.  Until next time...


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For The Beauty Of The Earth

One of my parishioners sent me an interesting article this morning.  It was an article about something that the Pope stated the other day.  He was discussing art in all of its forms, painting, music, poetry, etc. and how when people are exposed to art they are also "invited by beauty to 'ascend to God.'"  I have to agree with him.  In my own life I have been exposed to various works of art.  I am always amazed at the gifts that some people are able to create with their own hands.  People are creative because God is creative.  He created the Heavens and the Earth and since we are made in his image, we also create.

But I think it goes beyond just creating something.  God speaks to us in so many amazing ways.  He loves people so much that he is trying to get our attention in what ever way that he can.  He seeks us out with his Holy Spirit and draws us to himself.  He does so out of his deep love and compassion for people.  Through all of creation we are beckoned to God and brought up to his very throne-room.

Unfortunately, not everyone is able to see him through the works of art, nature, or relationships.  Sometimes we choose to close our eyes to the great beauty surrounding us, both human-made and made by God.  When we lived in Kentucky, Myranda and I enjoyed going for drives through the Bluegrass during the spring and fall.  It was absolutely incredible to see the majesty and beauty of the world around us.  I don't know if people who were born and raised in that country ever truly appreciate it or not.

Kentucky Horse Farm outside of Danville, KY

On the other hand, being raised in West Texas, there is a unique beauty of in our country too.  Maybe it's not as evident this year as in other years, but it is there for us to see.  In the three years I lived in Kentucky I never saw a sunset that even came close to the sunsets that we have here in our part of the world.  In fact, because of the hills and trees, I'm not sure I ever saw a sunset at all.

West Texas sunset outside of Tahoka, TX

St. Paul tells us in Romans that "Ever since the creation of the world his eternal power and divine nature, invisible though they are, have been understood and seen through the things he has made."  Regardless of where we live, God reveals himself to us.  It is up to us to raise our eyes and look for him in all of creation.

Whether we are looking in art galleries, listening to fine pieces of music, reading heart warming poetry, or hiking through the natural world, let's look to see God's activity and his amazing calling card that he leaves for us to see him.  Until next time...


"Therefore, may our visits to places of art be not only an occasion for cultural enrichment--also this--but may they become, above all, a moment of grace that moves us to strengthen our bond and our conversation with the Lord, [that moves us] to stop and contemplate--in passing from the simple external reality to the deeper reality expressed--the ray of beauty that strikes us, that 'wounds' us in the intimate recesses of our heart and invites us to ascend to God.''--Pope Benedict XVI





+May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Spirit be with you.

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